Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I have a prayer list a mile long today and a heart so full it could combust.
I'm piecing together recent conversations and making a patch work quilt out of what makes sense.
Talks of dreams and who I once was. Talks of hopes and who I am now. Conversations littering my mind while I build from where I'm at.
Peacefully hoping.
Prayerfully waiting.Everyone handles their path differently.
This is how I handle mine: I feel my heart through it, I write my way out, & I converse on repeat until I come to a level ground of confidence.
It's not wrong but it's not fast.
And at the moment, I want to arrive at my destination yesterday.
I'm praying & listening.

Sometimes when I pray, I realize I already have the answers--I just don't like them, so I pray a little longer hoping God will change His mind.
{He's patient.}
Sometimes I pray and I'm not sure I heard Him right so I ask again for clarity and then I hear him without hesitation.
Sometimes, it's easier not to hesitate than others.So my heart is a whirlpool of question right now and I'm asking:
God, what's your plan for me?
I see You working. I feel You moving.
I'm waiting on you because I don't have the confidence to move yet.
Lord, be patient with me and guide my every step.

I'm learning who I am as a wife. I am growing in who I am as a mother.
I know who I want to be--or who I wanted to be--and I'm digging through that earthly confusion.
One lovely moment at a time.
Just one--
at a time.

5 comments:

  1. What a beautiful and inspiring post, my friend! Aren't you glad He's patient with us? He probably just shakes his head (with a little smile) so often... :)

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  2. Doesn't it just about give you goosebumps when you know He is busy at work behind the scenes? We are just patiently waiting to see the final outcome and He's busy orchestrating the whole thing. Here's to the works that are being done behind the curtain of your life.

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  3. I think you're great. :)

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