Monday, December 7, 2009

The reason I will never own a BMW...

Did I say reason?
As in, there is only one reason that I will never own my White X5?
There are many reasons
but lets pretend I could afford it
lets pretend that the car doesn't cost years of wages where I'd starve, go naked, and dehydrate
lets pretend it wouldn't be a choice between sending my son to college
(USC mind you...fight on)
or driving.
lets pretend we wouldn't have to live in the car and attach a camper to it to survive.
lets pretend...

When I believed I would be single and barren for eternity my dream was to own a white house, have a white cat, and drive a white BMW 325i with brown leather interior.
I would own a white Pottery Barn couch and I would rule my own world in Gucci glasses and Prada shoes.

I cashed in on that dream for something far better--
an awesome marriage and a gorgeous baby boy.
Despite the fact that I never became an attorney in family law and wouldn't be able to buy my BMW
I realize something deeper...

I never want a thing to be more important than someone I love.

Accidents happen.
Just ask my mom.
In 1985 I found a pack of peppermint Bubble Yum.
When I was done, my piece went right into my mom's beloved Jeep Wagoneer Seat.
My dad bought her a brand new Mercedes back in 1987
The first day of owning it, my sister took a bite out of the passenger side head rest.

About a year ago, the hus and I bought our first piece of brand new furniture--
a Pottery Barn Coffee Table.
I felt like we had accomplished something huge.
I wanted to engrave Pottery Barn on the top just so people knew, WE DID IT!
Well, we didn't engrave it with those words...
the table has been engraved though....
with the scars of trucks and cars being tossed across it by one precious little man
(so precious I want to squeeze him too tight sometimes).

Point is, it got me thinking--
it's just a thing!
I don't want to own nice things if it means I will make my son think he's worth less.
I need to own things knowing they aren't going anywhere with me
but I have one chance to make my little boy's heart right.So, goodbye BMW.
Not because I can't afford you
(I am sure I could sell enough blood to buy you)
But because I'd be a wreck if my little man bit a hole in your head rest or smashed a cracker into your German leather.


  1. aaaah. i love it. perfect perspective.

    I'm still holding on to hope for my X5. That dream is going to be a tough one to kill! ;) I promise I'll let you drive it whenever you're in town. Maybe that is what it would take to get you to move here?!


  2. Amen! I can't fathom going into debt for 4 wheels and a steering wheel. It's not worth it! Then again, I drive a purple 1996 Ford Explorer. ;)

  3. nothing like a sweet no no a bmw just can't compete. I wanted an old 1980 bm for a while.

  4. This is a great reminder for everyone. Thanks for posting! Sometimes my superficial self needs a little reality check! =)

  5. Allegra, you are so wise, seriously. What you write about is always dead on. Thank you for your honesty and speaking your heart!

  6. Too funny...a black BMW has always been my husband's dream car. Never gonna happen, but it's okay to dream right??

  7. When we purchased our first farmstyle dining room table they asked us if we wanted to pay extra for distressing it.... we laughed and said no thank you we plan on having kiddos that will do it for us! And now the more distressed the better!

  8. My dream car is a black x5. I along with Tracie, can't quite give up that dream. :) I miss you! Thanks for checking in. Work is bussier than ever. I'm going to be happy once the new year hits.
    Hope you're doing well!

  9. i love it!
    let's chat the minute your little guy graduates high school and leaves the house.

  10. A honda mini is my sexy ride. It smells like spoiled milk(from all the lattes that have taken a tumble) and there's goldfish crackers ground into the carpet. Nice!