Friday, July 16, 2010

briefcase basketcase

I find myself holed up in a room closing the daylight out and wanting to sleep.
I feel congested by my own thoughts and the voices I'm making others have.
I had to sit down and force myself to think and figure out how long we have lived in this new house because it seems that the fast forward button hasn't released me and I have no grasp of time.
So, this one is for all you workin' mama's out there...

I stepped into a new role at the office that has so much more responsibility.
It was a blessing--is a blessing--to have someone see my worth, to have someone offer me such a great position, but as it turns out, that whole "keeping the same schedule" thing was that *too good to be true* fine print.

I'm swamped and I don't know how to leave work at the office anymore.
It follows me like my shadow.

I am on empty with nothing left to give but with a toddler, there's never an off.
I find myself at my desk thinking,
"I wish I were with my son."
He's at this incredible age and I want to lose myself in his last baby days.
He's just growing up SO fast!
What if I am missing it because I am too tired.too over extended. too, too, too.

Really stuck.
So thankful for all I have.
And so stuck.


  1. i wish i had some words of wisdom for you. finding a balance can be difficult. enjoy your time with your family as much as you can and get your rest. sending you prayers and hugs, susan

  2. I'm praying for you. I don't know what it's like to be in your shoes but I know that God made you one strong woman. I admire you for your strength and all that you've overcome. Just keeping taking it step by step, day by day. Hope you find peace in the midst of chaos.

  3. Thank you again for putting into words so many of us feel. Thank you for putting yourself out there I am right there with you. Praying for you.

  4. I work too, although only part time but I just try to really be present in the moments that I do have with my daughter. We can't create more hours in the day, as much as we'd like to. But we can make the minutes count. Try to set boundaries and you may have a make a tough choice in regards to your job and what YOU are personally capable of handling. Not all women are capable of being a wife, mother and working full time, I being one of them. :) Working part time (and then some) is hard prayers are to stay home full time someday.

  5. oh girl, I am the same way, lately it has gotten worse..ugh! I try to set boundaries, leave when I am allowed to leave, and make sure not to take work home with me, even though I do once in a is hard, and as hard as it is, your son will grow you knowing he had an amazing mom who worked and took such good care of him! just be very present when you are with him, and it only takes small things to make them feel so special!