A Wordy Update!

A LOT has been going on in the past month or so...both challenges & blessings.

And here I am, a little lost in where to start because I haven't heard my own voice in so long
but I'll make this attempt to start somewhere!
About a month ago now my little man got a pretty intense cold and it turned into just the start of a series of illnesses.
It seems to have come to an end about a week ago after a trip to the Dr. & then a request we go to the ER for blood work & X rays.
For weeks the Dr's had been telling me, "He doesn't have symptoms now" and I would leave $20 poorer and feeling frustrated-- THIS ISN'T MY KID! I don't care if you say he's ok right now!
To make a very long story short, he ended up with a hip infection that limited his ability to walk and PRAISE GOD there was no bacteria. I couldn't handle another bout with sepsis in my life!

During that same time of illness, I was visited with a very dark moment in my life.
I had been working my butt off and essentially discovered I was letting it kill me.
I had a come to Jesus moment and fell apart and through my dear, dear friend & my mom, I heard Him calling me home & I decided to fight for my life.
I reclaimed my servant's heart and redirected my attention.
It seems I've spent months in this fight.
Something feels different now.


So there we were with a sick midget and a broken hearted but refound me and we got some news, work life was going to look different for my husband- his hours were being cut.
Faith or Fight moment.
We chose faith.
Ok, Lord-fearless we say, let this moment be yours.
He gave us this time for my husband to:
a) be a stay at home dad
b) keep our son from daycare and allow his immunity to rebuild
c) look at me one afternoon and say, "I really want this for you"
meaning, he wants me to be a stay at home mom, too.
He gave us this time for me to:
a) Come to Him and Choose Him...daily
b) Make room for Him in my heart
c) To challenge who I say He is - If I believe He can move mountains and work miracles, why do I limit Him with my doubt?
This unchosen moment has actually been one I wouldn't take away.

And in & amongst ALL of this is the greatest blessing of all....
We are expecting a little cherub this August!
Just days to making it exactly 1 year since my most challenging loss, we were given a new life to love.
The emotions I have had with that are a different post in itself but above all
I am so thankful.
SO very THANK FULL.

To close it out for the moment, I heard Rick Warren say something on a sermon I relistened to today: If the devil can't make you bad he'll make you busy.
All of a sudden, the past several weeks and how they have slowed us down felt like an unbelievable blessing to see all the things I was filling my life with that were not of Him or for Him.
He's at work in it all!